H-E-L-L-O!

Well, hello. It's been a reallllly long time. I'm currently being kept busy by college life, and I have that other tempting blog site too, so there happened a super long hiatus of me writing here. But then just some minutes ago, I got the urge to write here again, even though I don't know what to write. Okay, here goes.

I'm currently in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend. Distance...is really a pain in the ass. There are times I wished I could lean on his shoulder and whine as much as I want for the stressful new life in the university. Well technology helps, in many ways, but it's not enough. And there are also times when we both were too tired or too busy to even send some texts or make some calls. However, we're getting through it, fortunately :) I hang on to these words as I face this distance....

This got to be true.

source

We've been together for two years last December 11th, and I hope I'm still going to count for the upcoming years ~(._.~)(~._.)~

Well. I guess that's all for now, gonna text later!

This Morning

This morning, I had done my prayer, cleaned my room and tidied it up, swept the house, washed the dishes, cooked (although it was some mere plain fried eggs), helped my little sister took her bath and put on her uniforms, taken my own bath and done my breakfast, uploaded yesterday photos to facebook, and even posted something to this blog, finally :")

And I'm gonna meet my boyfriend soon.

I feel good, and alive, yes. Have a nice day.

How do you know when you’re in love with someone? Is it when he’s the first thing that comes into your mind when you wake up and the last thing that you think of before you go to sleep? Or is it when your heart melts every time he looks into your eyes? The truth is, the signs come in a thousand different ways.

When you’re having a really bad day and hearing his voice on the phone just makes it all go away. When all you want to do is listen to him talk passionately about his plans for the future. When you would sacrifice your shopping time just to cheer him up on the field. When a mention of his name makes you miss him so much. When all you want to do is staying up and taking care of him when he’s sick. When your face glows every time you meet him. When even the way he laughs and eats and sleeps fascinate you. When you realize you can finish each other’s sentences. When you can recognize his perfume from miles away. When you laugh when he laughs. When you love seeing the reflection of yourself in his eyes. When you can’t stop smiling every time people talk about the two of you. When you remember him in your prayer. When you feel that he’s the only one who can understand you. When everything that makes him happy will make you happy, no matter how hurtful it is inside. When you’re often torn between your own egocentricity and your feelings for him. When you’re really mad at him but all you want to do is cry on his shoulder. When you can’t help glancing at him every other second as you’re both in the car and he’s seriously watching the traffic.When you actually enjoy the moment when he’s teasing you eventhough you’re pissed. When you dreams of yourself being married to him with kids. When you want to be the woman who makes him coffee and puts on his tie every morning. When you’re seriously reconsidering the relocation because it means leaving him as you move to another country. When you find his boyish whining attitude is endearing. When you find his snoring endearing. When you have your own nickname for him. When every time his name pops up in your inbox you smile. When you gladly wipes his sweat as he changes your flat tire. When you find his singing entertaining eventhough he can’t carry a tune. When you forget when was the last time his name doesn’t cross your mind. When you can remember perfectly the sound of his funny laugh, his fake laugh, and his amused laugh. When he’s the only face you want to be on your 500 bucks Anya Hindmarch be-a-bag. When you would stay awake just to watch him sleep. When you’re seriously thinking of getting a tattoo of his name on your left hand. When he makes you happy and makes you cry at the same time. When you want him to always be your ‘imam’ when you’re praying. When you’re glad that you can be helpless sometimes because it means you can rely on his strong arms to help you. When being with him makes you want to be a better person. When everything could go wrong in the world and it’s okay, because he’s there, with you.

taken from Ferinda's Xenon Flash

Finally.....

......subhanallah, still can't believe somehow. Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah.

Under the Bottom

Arguing about things waste your time. If you still have your mind for determining which one is right or which one is wrong, you'll end up running all your time out without you noticing. The point is not right or wrong, true or false. The idea is not what you think, but what you feel on the opposite party. The fact is that there exists someone out there who is affected by your actions, either right or wrong. And that they do feel pain.

For The Day To Come

source: here

It's for having a person who is willing to accept everything in you and wait patiently to hear you say, "I'm home."

What I Did During Indonesian Test

The things I like about this world
are how there exist a huge number of words
waiting to be spoken
or to be written

and how there are billion ways
to extend and deviate the meaning that each word bears

and how there are different ways to hear
a same word here just by judging the way they appear

and the fact that I do stop myself from any other thing sometimes
just to think how to make this rhymes


RLA

This is a hard time. The time when the rest of the future rely on. The time when a hell lots of effort have to be given. When sacrificing some fun is necessarry. When killing other unimportant desires to pursue one so-called dream is the only thing you think you should do.

Do you really think that this hard time will be over soon? Do you really think you will acquire a lifetime goal by throwing your true self away? Do you really think it is fair to you, or even to other people around you? Do you think you can reach that enormous achievement of yours while forgetting your already-in-hand treasure? Or do you, actually, think that what you already have right now is not that valuable compared to what you're going to get? Do you really think it is just one of the sacrifices that you should give away?

Do not think that I'm against all the fighting. I'm with you. But, open your eyes. Have fun.

Seventeen Pieces of Crappy Things

I make excuses.
I tell lies.
I procrastinate.
I hate organized things.
But when I have them organized, I hate it when they fell apart.
I don't know what I wish to be.
I am green with envy.
I get annoyed easily.
I hate waiting.
I ever really wish to be sick.
I used to be just fine with myself, but I'm not anymore.
I hate having to depend on others and the fact I still do.
I can't tell what I want to say.
I'm living in a wake-eat-bath-study-eat-study-eat-bath-study-sleep cycle that never ends.
I wish to be able to stop studying without any guilty feelings haunting me after.
I hate school.
I do want to be sick right now.

Trust

It's like walking blindfolded, with someone with soft voice keeps telling you to keep going no matter what. And you're too helpless you have no other choice than trusting. You were thinking of giving up sometimes, but your hope of brightness is the only thread you're hanging onto. You know more than any other that the only thing you should never given up is this tiny hope in your palms. You can't live without it, you can only wish that that hope will not wither even in winter.

"...but I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell.

I know right now you can't tell,

But stay a while and maybe than you'll see

a different side of me

I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired

I know right now you don't care

But soon enough you're gonna think of me

and how I used to be, me."

Matchbox Twenty - Unwell

Call Me Unreasonable

Sometimes you don't need reasons for your actions. You do things merely because you feel like doing it. You love someone or something simply because you love them. You hate things because they're not your liking. It's as simple as that. Reasons are important, but not in every single bit of life. Rather than seeking for the reason, appreciating is much, much better.

What will you do?

So, another year has passed. I got to admit that eventhough I've gone through 17 new-years until this time, and I do understand that there's nothing 'happy' in new year, I'll still say, happy new year! That's really a hypocrisy, but whatever.

I don't mind celebrating new year and I love it, in some ways. I have a friend come over my house and we killed the time by watching movie and do some girly quality talk. But still, the inevitable fact about new year is that another year of your lifetime is taken away. And there's no way in hell you could take them back.

What do you think about your time? What is the price of your second? A second passed so fast you wouldn't notice that it had already gone. Tick. Look, another second has gone again. And we don't think we're affected by those passing seconds. They don't really matter, do they?

Then wait until your plenty of seconds had been cut to almost nothing. You'll remember your unsatisfied desires; your dreams and wishes that you still had not reached; your family, friends, and lovers who you had not given adequate love yet. Tick, tick, tick. You're panic then, you're afraid that you'll lose your time again.

So, what will you do?

While you think............ Tick.